Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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