i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Who died my cat blue again?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
