i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
