There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Randomize
