id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
