oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize