youre lurking in front of me
Non-Jews are for practice
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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