he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize