At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
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