another moral hangover. fuck.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Randomize
