That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I want to fling myself into the sun
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize