he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
