Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
