I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
