You really coming over, don't trick.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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