Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
