I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
literally had 100 drinks last night.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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