that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize