I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
