I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize