hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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