Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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