The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
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