I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Im part way to drunk.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
