You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
