he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize