Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize