ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Mom said you looked used
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I would ride that face into the sunset
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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