it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
