Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
