If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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