Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
