We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize