i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
