I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
