1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
