how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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