i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
