no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize