I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
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