: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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