o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
