Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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