I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I fill condoms, not promises.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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