So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize