HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
