Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
too bad you live with your parents still
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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