Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
