It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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