Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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