he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
