I'm so fucking centered right now
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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