Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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