I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Randomize
